Rain
WARNING: CONTAINS SEXUALLY EXPLICIT CONTENT
Title : Rain
Pairing: Eminem/Kim
Summary: Em and Kim are trying work things out, meanwhile- fourteen year old Lily Rayne has problems of her own.AUTHOR'S NOTES: I will NOT be address Kim's niece who is supposedly living with them. For the purposes of this, she doesn't exist in their home permanently. 1) I don't want to complicate things MORE. 2) Some sources say her name is Amy others say it's Aidan. 3) I'm the author and it's my right! It's fanfic! :-) I will *also* not really be addressing Nathan *too* much. He may pop up- but he's not living with them either. ALSO I am assuming the book "Cleanin' Out My Closet" is a load of crap since that's what the man himself said. So any information J.R. Watkins said about Kim or Em and their relationship does not apply here.
ONE MORE THING!!! This fiction is color coded for ease of reading since there are three main characters!! Anytime you see (------), it means time has passed. Here's the KEY:
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----------11
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"Okay, Jess- what color should we make the flowers?" I ask, glancing at the *mess* that's on the table. Shit. It's a lot to clean up. But… she's *so* happy and it was *way* better than watching freakin' *Teletubbies*.
"Bue," she says and tosses me the green paper.
"This is green."
"Dat geen?"
"Yeah, it's green. Do you want blue flowers?"
"Yeah. Bue fewers," she nods. "To minsk it."
"Mix it?"
"Yesh."
"Mix what, Jess?"
"Da fewers. Minsk da fewers."
"OH! You want blue and green flowers? You want both?"
"Yeah, bof."
"Okay." She's so cute. She's like… the director of the show and she knows it. But… Marcie'll love it and I haven't thought about- shit. Well- I *hadn't* thought about Mom for a whole two minutes. That's improvement, right?
I figure Jess'll give the card to Marcie tomorrow and they can have a nice little daughter-mommy thing and I don't know what I'll do. I was thinking perhaps I'd go visit Mom's grave.
I cut a couple of flower-shaped pieces from the green paper and show them to her. "Okay?"
"O.K." She nods and takes them from me. "Da goo? Da goo!" She grabs a q-tip from the small pea of Elmer's glue I left on a plate for her and places the flowers on the front of the card.
I hand her a couple blue flowers and she places them as carefully as a two-year-old can.
"Where da Mommy?" She asks me with her hands turn up in the air. "All ga!"
Yeah, Jessie. The Mommy's all gone.
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++++++++I glance at the clock when I hear the door alarm be deactivated and reactivated. *Two* *a* *m*. Fuckin' *bitch* stays out until *two* *a* *m*.
No call. No *nothing*.
And she actually looks fuckin' *shocked* when I'm sitting in bed, drumming my fingers on the portable stereo.
"Where the hell were you?" I *try* not to growl. I mean- she's got a valid point here but disappearing is *not* the way to-
"Not in a trunk," she snorts and heads over to her dresser.
Shit. Fine. I press play on the stereo and fuck her head turns when she hears sound coming from it. Before I can even *stop* her, she's grabbed the stereo and *thrown* it across the room. "FUCK YOU!" She screams.
"Kim- the girls-" Shit. I thought- fuck. I just keep fucking this *up*.
"Well- let's *educate* the girls, shall we? We'll tell 'em my mother's day present from Daddy is my slow and painful death! FUCK YOU."
Grrr.
I grab her and thrust my tongue into her mouth. If I can just get her to shut up long enough to-
"GET OFF ME!" She shrieks and she's shaking *so* bad right now- her entire body is shaking.
I immediately let her go. Fuck- what has gotten *into* her. "Did you take anything?" I ask her as she grabs an extra t-shirt from my drawer.
She's shaking as she walks to the door. "Where are you *going*?" I ask. Shit. I gotta make sure she's okay.
"I'm not gonna fuckin' stay in the same *bed* as you." She closes the door behind her. Shit. If I go- she's likely to scream. And shit- okay.
I open the door and peer out into the hallway. She closes one of the guestroom doors and fine. I better just… leave her be, I guess.
I open Whitney's door first, but she's still fast asleep, as is Hailie. Thank god for small favors.
I guess… shit- there's nothing I can do?
*********
God *dammit*. I pull his shirt on and it smells like him. Fuck.
What the hell am I gonna *do*?
I can't… *do* this again. And it's *worse* this time because of… because I *thought* that we had… moved beyond- I thought we'd… FUCK. And Rayne. What the hell are we gonna do about her and the girls and FUCK.
I'm shaking, my whole body is. God, I'm just so tired and I inhale his scent from his shirt, bury my nose in it as I curl up under the covers.
Happy Mother's Day, Kim.
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~~~~~~~~"Rae-Rae!"
I groan when Jessie starts bouncing on the bed.
"Rae-Rae, uppie!"
"Jessie, it's too early," I groan and pull the covers over my head. I just wanna sleep through this entire day.
"'Mon, 'mon, Rae-Rae, in da mornin' Mommy. Mommy in da mornin'!"
"Jessie!" I hear Rob say from the door and a few minutes later, the door is closed and it's quiet in my room again.
Ah, blissful silence!
++++++++
It's too fuckin' quiet in here and I didn't sleep very well.
Fuck. I gotta… figure out how to fix this.
If she'd just *listen* to the damn thing. I think she'd actually like it, but this may be more about the *other* songs than this one.
FUCK!
"Daddy?" Oh- good thing I didn't say that out loud.
"Yeah, Baby?"
"Where's Mommy?" She asks, worried.
"Down the hall," I answer and now I'll lie and I *hate* lying to Hailie. "She wasn't feelin' well last night so she went to the other room."
"Why?" She asks as she crawls under the covers with me.
Damn kids' curiosity. "Because she didn't wanna keep me up all night."
She glances at the CD player. Oh yeah- I didn't pick it up. Kim was pretty fuckin' mad last night too because it kinda blew apart. Or it was shotty to begin with.
"Did ya have a fight?" Perceptive child. She's smart- like Rayne.
"Hai-"
"Is Mommy gonna leave?" She asks, almost teary-eyed.
Dammit! She remembers us fighting. We always tried not to do it around her, but-
"Hailie-"
"Just tell me the truth."
"I don't know. I don't think so… I hope not."
"Daddy," she says, moving to sit on my chest. "Listen to me, ya gotta fix this, Daddy. I don't wanna *leave*. I wanna stay *here*."
"I know, Hai. I'm gonna try, okay? I promise."
"Are we still gonna cook breakfast and give Mommy her presents?"
"Yeah- of course we will," I say and yank her down for a bit hug. God- kids are awesome. Shit- what the hell am I gonna do? I can't let Hailie down.
*********
What the hell am I gonna do?
I can't do Round twenty million of Marshall and Kim.
I don't have the energy for this *again*. We've played the game one too many times.
Ya know- I really thought we were making progress, taking each others' feelings into account. But then he goes and does *this*? Tries to *fuck* me last night and make me forget?
Contrary to popular opinion, I'm not some revolving door and I *sure* as hell am not here for his enjoyment *or* amusement. If he can't find something else to say in his fuckin' songs-
FUCK. I can't stay here if he's gonna *be* like this.
<Knock. Knock.>
"Mommy?"
I sit up and he opens the door. Hailie walks in triumphantly carrying a tray.
"Look, Mom!! Me and Daddy cooked you breakfast!"
"You did?!" I smile. She's *so* proud of herself. "Wow!"
He places Whitney on the bed and kisses my forehead quickly and I don't wanna smack him away in front of her. "Happy Mother's Day, Kim." But then he steps away and stands on the other side of the room, leaning back against the dresser.
"Yeah! Happy Mother's Day, Mom!"
"Thanks, Hailie," I say, glancing at the tray. "Wow, looks really yummy." And it does. Eggs, toast, OJ and I think this is the first morning I haven't felt nauseous since we heard from Rayne.
"Doesn't it look good, Mommy? Daddy helped me with the hot stuff."
"Yeah, Hailie. Thank you."
"And we have *presents*. Dad- where they at?"
"Oh-" he runs out of the room quick and comes back with a bag and bouquet of flowers.
"Here! See? He said lilies are your favorite!"
Yeah. Kind of ironic when you think about it now, huh? "They're gorgeous. Thanks."
++++++++
Yeah. This ain't awkward or anything, is it?
Hai gives Kim the cards that she wanted and the stuffed animal she claims Whitney wanted to give Kim.
"Where's the *other* thing, Dad?"
Oh right. "In the bottom of the closet- remember what the bag looks like?"
"YEAH!" She nods and runs off.
I just stand here and cross my arms. "She *knows* we're fightin' again," I inform her but she doesn't acknowledge my comment and continues playin' wit' Whit.
"Mom!" Hai runs in and dives onto the bed. "Open it! OPEN IT!" She says, handing Kim the small box.
"What's this?" She asks.
"Your mommy's day present from me and Whit."
Kim opens the box and almost starts to cry. It's a Mother's Ring- the birthstones of her children. *All* her children. Luckily, I told Hai it was family ring with *my* birthstone there too, but Rayne was born in October, so-
"Do you like it, Mom?" Hai asks. "Do ya? Do ya?"
"Yeah, yes, Hai. I love it." Hailie hugs her tightly and Kim just stares at me with tears in her eyes.
"Daddy has something too. Doncha, Daddy?!"
Oh Hai- tryin' to fix somethin' that ain't her fault to fix… "Another time, Hai. Mommy's prolly hungry and-"
"NO! NOW!!" She shouts, pounding her hands in her lap. I *knew* I shouldn't have taken her with me to the jewelry store. "Ya gotta give it to her *now*."
Fuck. I can't say no to my kid. I'm a bad parent.
I take the bag from the end of the bed and pull the longer box out. I sit on the edge of the bed and hand her the box. "I'm *really* proud to call you the mother of my children," I say and she takes it and Hailie orders her to open it, so she does.
*********
Yeah- proud enough to murder me! Woohoo!
I open it up and- god, it's… beautiful. Diamond bracelets usually are.
"Don't you *totally* love it, Mommy?!" Hailie asks, tugging on my shirt. "Isn't it *great*? You should kiss Daddy!"
"Hailie-" I say. "*You* should mind your own beeswax," I tickle her stomach.
"Kiss him! Kiss Daddy thank you, Mommy!"
"Hailie can you take Whitney into your room for a bit?" I ask.
"Yes," she says and doesn't move for a minute. "*Only* if you kiss Daddy."
"Okay, Hailie," Marshall says. "That's enough from you. Why don't you head to your room and we'll go down in a few minutes and do Playstation. Okay?"
"NO!!!" She shrieks and scares Whitney. "I'M NOT LEAVING!" She screams at us and tears start flowing from her little eyes. "IT'S NOT *FAIR*! Whitney and I don't wanna leave, so you have to kiss and make-up!"
Wow. That's… the first time she- fought back. She's got our blood in her yet.
"Now *KISS*!"
Marshall turns to me and… yeah- okay- if it'll make Hailie stop crying… god. She's *so* upset.
I nod and he leans toward me, placing his hand on the other side of my hip to support himself, and brushes my lips with his. Shit. No. No fair. I'm *mad* at him. I'm not supposed to wanna kiss him and never stop.
He pulls away after a minute and his lips linger over mine and I can't help but lick his bottom lip quickly because I said it before and I'll say it again- he *will* be the last man I ever kiss, I know that much.
He turns back to Hailie and says, "Okay- now leave Mommy and me for a few minutes, 'kay?"
She sniffles but nods and picks Whitney up before leaving and closing the door behind her.
He turns back to me and- OH MY GOD! He tries to kiss me again but I shove him away *hard*.
"No fuckin' *way*!" I yell at him. God. Asshole.
"Admit it, Kim. You *liked* the kiss. Just cut the bullshit and-"
"Bullshit?!" I ask. "If that's all my feelings are to you, then you can keep this," I say and throw the bracelet at him. God. I'm *soo* *MAD* at him!
"Kim-"
"NO. I don't… god- I can't *do* this, Marsh. I'm just too tired." God. I *am* too. "I'm-"
"You're not fuckin' *leavin'*, Kim. Not wit'out *listenin'* to me."
"I'm moving in *here*," I announce. I can't be with him- I can't lay next to him and I sure as fuck am *not* gonna let him *touch* me.
"Kim-"
"Don't," I say. "Just don't. Just… leave me alone."
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++++++++She wanted to left alone? I fuckin' *left* her alone. All fuckin' *day* and I fuckin' put Hai to bed and read her a story and shit and come back and find her closet half empty and all the shit from her dresser is gone.
I notice she threw the stereo in the garbage and the CD's gone. She took it? Prolly broke it in half in one of her pissy moods.
God- how the fuck can I change this if she won't fuckin' *talk* to me! She's *never* *not* fought. I mean- she fuckin'… gave up. No yelling, no throwing fists or books. What does that *say* about us?
~~~~~~~~
"Lil?"
"Yeah?" I turn toward the door. "You… we didn't see you all day."
"I know, I just- been reading. Wanna at least know what they've been doing, so-"
"Are you okay?" She asks.
"Yeah. I just-" I shrug. "Happy Mother's Day," I tell her with a tear in my eye. How come I can't have *my* mother?
"Oh, Lily-"
"Please- I just…" I wipe my eyes. "I gotta finish this chapter. What time we gotta leave in the morning?"
"Seven."
I nod and she closes the door behind her. Good. I love Marcie, but… I just- *nothing* she can say or do can make this better. It's been a freakin' *month*- more than, almost five weeks and… it's not *getting* better.
Shit. I glance at the clock. It's eight-thirty. Shit. I grab the phone. I've been freakin' debating about this all day, but- I just… I don't know. I just- think she-
<Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring.>
"Hello?" Shoot. I can't- fuck. It's her, but- "*Hello*?"
"Yes- hi. Don't- it's-"
"Oh god," she sobs. She sounds… upset. "Ra-Lily, how… what's going on?"
"I just… are you okay?" Shit. Did I call at a bad time?
"Yeah, yeah- infinitely better *now*."
"I just… thought I'd call and- I mean… thanks for- Happy Mother's Day." Lame. Lame. LAME.
"Thank you, Lily. That's… I wasn't expecting to hear from you."
"Yeah. I can't… talk long. I have school tomorrow, but-"
"School? You decided to go back?"
"Oh- no. I… applied- to the Academy and they accepted me to finish the school year and then they're gonna see about next year."
"OH THAT'S SO GREAT! Wow- I'm so *proud* of you- that's wonderful!"
I sigh. That's what Mom woulda said. "Yeah- so I gotta be up early, so…"
"Oh. Okay, Lily. Have a good day tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah. You too."
*********
I can't stay with him.
But- I can't leave him either.
But hearing her voice… made it better for a minute.
And tomorrow- gross. I hate going to the doctor, but I haven't had a physical in a while and… it wouldn't matter, but my doctor *is* Hailie's doctor and she keeps nagging me about it.
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Okay. I am really not wanting to, but I wanna get out of this house, if only for a little bit.
"Where are you going?" He asks as I walk into the kitchen with my purse and keys in hand.
"Doctor's," I say, placing Whitney in the highchair. "I told you that a month ago. You said you'd keep Whitney." And *that's* the most I've really said to him today. "I'm pickin' Hailie up from school afterwards."
"Doctor? Are you okay?"
"Fine, that's ok. Want me to go wichu?"
I turn on him and he steps back. "*No*," I state. God- is he fuckin' *stupid*?
I mean- I don't wanna *talk* to him. I don't even wanna fuckin' *see* him right now.
I just gotta get the hell outta here.
"Bye, Baby. You stay with Dada?"
"K," she says.
"Okay," I kiss her on the forehead and grab a bottle of water anyway.
"You're gonna get Hai then?"
"Yeah."
++++++++
Dammit. Okay. Tonight- I'm gonna make things right.
I'll take the kids to Aunt Betty's and then I'll come back, put on some romantic music shit, light some candles and make her dinner. I'll pamper her and *her* her how much I love her.
Maybe I can *then* get her to listen to the damn song, even if I gotta tie her down to do it.
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*********"Kimberly?"
I stand up and follow her in. "Well? Do you have the results?"
God, I hate needles, but they wanted to do some routine blood work- but there's nothing routine about taking blood out of my veins. But she wanted to check my hormone levels.
"Everything normal, Terri?" I ask her.
"Well, Kim, your hormone levels a bit elevated though-"
"What? What's wrong? Is everything-"
"Everything is fine, Kim."
"But they're-"
"Kim," she stops me. "They're fine for a woman in your condition."
"My condition?" Oh god-
"You're pregnant."
Huh?
Author: crazyevildru@yahoo.com
These stories are for entertainment purposes only. They are completely fictitious, and the authors mean no harm to EMINEM, his family, friends, or anyone else that may have been depicted as a 'real life' character. No money was made on the fiction here, either directly or indirectly, i.e. paid advertising. In other words - it's just a bunch of shit we wrote for fun. Please don't take it seriously.