Chapter 1
The crowd was wild. Water bottles and other paraphernalia were being tossed onto the stage as twenty thousand plus fans stood chanting his name "Eminem, Eminem, Eminem". Marshall Bruce Mathers III stood back stage a headache beginning to form behind his left eye. They wanted an encore and he would give them one. His *fans*. He smiled to himself as he thought of all his fans out there. The ones who supported him through everything. Good and Bad. He would do this for them. He took a long pull from his water and tossed it aside as he rushed back into the madness. The place erupted as the strains of "Square Dance" reverberated through the overcrowded arena and the infamous *Eminem* gave the people, his fans, the encore they had begged for. He gave one last wave to the crowd and with a flip of the bird he was gone and yet they still chanted for more. He was dripping with sweat as he ran backstage and someone handed him a towel. He was tired. Of all of it. His life. The fame. He was so grateful for every fan that he got but as he pushed his way through the crowd of groupies throwing themselves at him backstage he wondered if it was all worth it. He managed to escape the hungry, half naked women backstage but not completely unscathed. He had a nasty scratch on his arm and one of them or all of them, he didn't know anymore, had ripped his shirt. He finally made it to his dressing room and threw himself on the couch. The headache was more than a dull ache now. It had grown a life of it's own. He grimaced at the pain bouncing around in his skull as he thought of those *sad* girls out there. They treated him like he was God. Didn't they understand that he was only human. He was flesh and blood just like them. He rested his head back against the couch fully intending to catch a few minutes peace but that peace like always was interrupted....
"Marsh" Paul said sticking his head in the dressing room "we need you out here, now. MTV is here to do an interview and then there are some people I promised autographs." Paul looked at Marshall and his heart ached a bit for him. He understood that Marshall was a simple man but this was the life he had chosen.
"Come on Marsh" Paul said with a note of sympathy "the sooner you get this done the sooner you can go home."
"Yeah" Marshall grumbled. He would just have to deal with this ache in his head for a bit longer. "I'm coming."
Marshall who was known to the world as Eminem the foul mouthed, trash talking, rap bully trailed after his manager and friend with a smile plastered to his face but inside he was dying.....
~*~
Marshall stretched out across the back of the limo tucking his hands underneath his head. He was beat. It had been a hell of a night. The interview with MTV had gone fairly well but he had signed so many autographs that he felt like his hand was on fire. The only positive thing he could think of at the moment was that he was finally heading *home*. He sighed and his baby blues fluttered closed. Hailie. He saw her sweet little smile dance through his abused mind. He missed her so much. She was growing up on him and he was missing so much of it. He drifted off to sleep, tonight, like so many other nights in the back of some limo or SUV in the middle of nowhere. Miles from home.
~*~
Marshall sat across from Dre in his office at interscope contemplating life. "I dunno Dre" Marshall said looking up at his mentor. His friend. "I wanna cut back some. Spend more time with Hailie."
"Aight" Dre said taking a good look at his friend. He looked tired. "You just wrapped up the tour and aren't due back in the studio for a few months so take them months to get your mind right."
"Thanks" Marshall said eternally grateful to Dre for understanding "I just need a break. I'm feeling antsy."
Dre laughed "With all those bitches on your dick I don't know what you have to be antsy about."
"That's just it" Marshall said honestly "I don't want that shit anymore."
"You need to go out and find you a good woman" Dre stated seriously.
"Yeah" Marshall sighed "I need that like I need a hole in the head."
Dre roared with laughter "Trust me dawg. A good woman will do wonders for your restlessness."
Marshall looked doubtful "After all the drama with Kim. I don't think I could handle another one."
"Sure you can" Dre smiled "you just need to find the *right* one."
~*~
It had been a glorious week since he had started his *vacation* and he was having so much fun with Hailie. He would miss this so much when his time was up but right now he had more important matters to ponder Hailie wanted pancakes so Marshall stood in the kitchen staring blankly at the box of Bisquick. What the hell was he supposed to do with this shit? He sighed turning the box over to read the instructions *one more time* Ok he thought to himself it couldn't be that hard. He got to work and had the sticky batter mixed up in no time. He'd made a bit of a mess but it was for a good cause. He poured the batter into the pan and stood back to survey his handy work. Now what? He thought. He let them cook for a minute and tried to flip them over. The perfectly rounded pancakes turned into gobs of goo as he tried to flip them with the spatula. He cursed to himself as he dumped the ruined pancakes in the trash. He smelled it immediately. What the fuck was burning?? He thought wildly. He looked into the trash can just in time to see the first flame spark.
"Fuck" he yelled running to the sink pan in hand filling it with water. He tossed the water onto the flames and watched as the flames sizzled and died.
"Dad" Hailie said from the entrance to the kitchen scrunching up her cute little nose "what are you doing and what is that smell?"
"You're pancakes" Marshall sighed glaring at the smoking garbage can.
"Oh Dad" she said running over to give him a big hug. He was so cute. "We don't have to have pancakes. Cereal is fine."
"No Hai" he said adamantly "you want pancakes, you get pancakes."
She smiled at him. Her innocent heart filling with love and admiration for this man, her father, who loved her to distraction "Then let's go to McDonald's"
"McDonald's?" he asked confused.
"Yeah" she smiled "they have pancakes, ya know?"
"Ok Hai Hai" he said relief running through his body "McDonald's it is."
They left house together smiling. Marshall and his baby girl were headed to McDonald's.
~*~
McDonald's was fairly quiet and Marshall was pretty sure that no one had recognized him. They sat down at one of the uncomfortable little booths and dug in. He was just about through breakfast when he was spotted.
A young girl no more than thirteen started screaming his name. Hailie's head snapped around to look at the girl with wide eyes "Dad, what is her problem?"
"I'm sorry Hai" he mumbled scooping up the remains of their breakfast and heading for the exit. He wasn't fast enough. The teen with lungs of steal cut him off at the pass.
"OHMYGOD" she gushed "it is you" she launched herself into his arms knocking him off his feet.
"Dad" Hailie said bewildered "you ok?"
"Oh Goodness" a women who looked to be around Marshall's age came bustling over offering Marshall her hand. He accepted and she helped pull him to his feet "I am so sorry. I went to the ladies room and I didn't realize....." she trailed off.
"It's ok" he muttered reaching for Hailie.
"MMMOOOMMM" the teen cried "don't you realize who that is?"
"Yes Libby" she said sternly "but that's no reason to attack the man while he is trying to have breakfast."
"But mom" she whined and that annoying whine instantly ceased at the look in her mothers eyes.
She turned back to Marshall "I am so sorry, Mr. Mathers" she said embarrassed "my daughter is a big fan of yours."
"It's ok" he said again feeling a little more at ease.
He stared down at the petite woman standing in front of him. He wouldn't call her beautiful really but she had a uniqueness about her. Her hair was the color of a fire burning out of control. Bright and full of life. She had the bluest eyes he had ever seen and an adorable sprinkling of freckles across the bridge of her nose.
She was talking and he had no idea what she was saying. He shook his head "I'm sorry, what were you saying" he asked.
"I was just apologizing again" she said her face turning red causing her freckles to stand out even more "I am so embarrassed by Libby's behavior."
"Don't worry about it" he said smiling. He couldn't really be mad at little Libby over there. If her were in her shoes he probably would have done the same thing. "If you get me something to write on I'll sign an autograph for her."
"Oh you don't have to do that" she bristled
"I'd be happy to" he replied cutting her off.
"Well thanks" she said digging in her purse for something he could sign. She pulled out an old grocery receipt and a pen handing them to him. "I'm afraid this is all I have."
He smiled at it "This'll do" he said leaning down to sign the worn receipt. He handed it back to her and her daughter immediately snatched it as she pulled a cell phone out of her pocket and began frantically dialing.
"Again I'm sorry for that" she said looking at both him and Hailie "she's a little high strung at times."
He smiled at her and said something that was so completely out there it had even him reeling in shock "Wanna go out sometime?"
"Huh?" she asked confused "did you just ask me out?"
He couldn't take it back and what the hell. She seemed like a nice woman "Yeah I think I did." he smiled at her.
She blushes "Oh my" she muttered shyly "well, ummm, ok"
He winked at her. She was awful cute and if it turned out she was only interested in his money he would have no one to blame but himself for acting so impulsively "Your number?" he prodded.
"What?" she asked dazed "Number?" she looked confused and then her face turned crimson again "oh you want my number?"
"That would help" he smiled.
She gave him her number and he told her that he'd call her. He was just about out the door when he realized that he hadn't even asked her name. He turned around and noticed that she was rooted to the exact same spot staring vacantly at nothing in particular "Excuse me" he called to her "I forgot to ask, what's your name?"
She turned to him "My name?" she muttered looking flustered "Oh yes, my name it's Brianna"
"Aight Brianna" he said with another devilishly sexy wink "I'll talk to you soon." and before she could think of a reply he was gone.
"You like her" Hailie said smiling at her daddy.
"Yeah Hai" he looked at her "I think I do."
"She is pretty" Hailie said looking back at the woman through the window.
"That she is" Marshall said ruffling Hailie's hair as they got into the SUV and headed home......Chapter 2
Author's Note: Big thanks to Alexia for the very sweet review that you left in the feedback section! You have no idea how much it meant to me! Also thanks to Jenn, Shorty, Taz and Christie for the feedback on Chapter 1.
Marshall laid diagonally across his bed *lost* in thought. His hands were folded casually and tucked under his cheek. He appeared to be gazing at nothing in particular. Brianna. Her name danced through his mind and he smiled. What a pretty name he thought silently to himself. It had been just over two weeks since he’d had his run in with the fiery red head and he hadn’t called her for that date he'd asked her on. He was a bit weary about the whole thing. It was so completely out of his nature to act so impulsively but she had just been so damn cute. He rolled over onto his back and contemplated the ceiling for a few minutes. Oh what the hell he thought throwing caution to the wind. What could it hurt. He reached over on the night stand grabbing the receiver......
~*~
Brianna was tired. Her head was pounding, her back ached and her feet were swollen to the size of grapefruits but Libby was happy. It was a tough job raising a thirteen year old by yourself. Libby had just about killed her today dragging her through the mall like she was some type of teenybopper. She sighed as she laid down the *numerous* packages full of Libby’s “phat gear” *as she so eloquently put it* and flopped down on the couch. Her tired eyes fluttered closed and her thoughts drifted to *Eminem*, her daughters girlhood crush and she winced a bit at the irony. He had asked her out on a date and Libby had bitched and moaned about how unfair it all was. Well it really didn’t matter since he’d never called, she should have known that he wouldn’t. When he’d asked her, an ordinary plain Jane woman she had gotten so excited but reality had set in soon enough. What would a man like him want with a woman like her? She was drifting off lost in all the “what if’s” when the phone rang. Her eyes popped open and she reached for the receiver.............
~*~
“Hai” Marshall bellowed from his room. He was standing in front of the mirror for the 1000th time in the last 30 minutes or so.
“What?” Hailie grumbled entering Marshall’s room *again*
“How’s this look baby?” he asked turning fromm side to side in proper runway fashion to show Hailie his outfit.
“Ggggggeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzeeeee Dad” Hailie said exasperated “what was the matter with the other one? I told you I liked the other one.”
“Yeah, yeah” he muttered “but doesn’t this one go better with my eyes?”
Hailie broke into a fit of giggles bending over to clutch her stomach. She looked up to see her daddy still *primping* in the mirror.
“Well?” he prodded.
“You’re worse than a girl” she said through her giggles “it’s just a date.”
He turned to glare at her “I am most certainly not worse than a girl you little shit” he said with just the right amount of outrage to make it funnier.
She couldn’t stop herself. She was cackling now.
In the end he settled on a pair of khaki cargo style pants with a khaki and navy blue button up shirt and a pair of khaki lugz boots. He surveyed himself in the mirror one more time before grabbing his keys and heading out.....
~*~
Brianna was pacing the house like a madwoman. She had pondered outfit choices for hours. She was so nervous that she’d smeared her mascara all over her face and had to start over. Her stomach was doing some crazy gymnastics routine and if he didn’t get here before she lost all her nerve she was going to have to have Libby tell him that she had been taken away by wild animals or something. She was frowning at her massive hair when the doorbell rang. She froze in place as the gymnastics team in her stomach kicked it into full gear. She heard Libby open the door and start gushing all over the poor man. She better go put a leash on that girl before things turned ugly she thought shaking her head.
Marshall was trying as best he could to disentangle himself from the teenager who had plastered herself to him but she was a strong little sucker.
“Libby” Brianna yelled from the hallway “release Mr. Mather’s right now young lady.”
“But mom....” Libby whined.
“Now” Brianna said with force “we discussed this kind of behavior already didn’t we?”
“Yeah but” Libby stammered.
“No but’s” Brianna countered “Brooke will be her in a bit to stay with you. Behave.”
Libby glared at her and made a very unladylike snort as she turned on her heel and headed down the hall leaving Marshall and Brianna staring after her. Marshall turned to look at Brianna and his eyes widened at the sight before him. He had thought that she wasn’t beautiful but he took it back now. She was more than beautiful...he was having trouble putting it into words so he settled on *exotic*. Her flame colored hair tumbled in a wild riot of big loose curls spiraling down her back to land just beneath her nicely rounded rear. Her blue eyes weren’t gentle. They were alive. Like ocean waves when they crest and crash against the shore. The sprinkling of freckles haphazardly placed across her cute little nose gave her an almost innocent look. She wasn’t dressed provocatively but somehow she managed to pull off sexy with no trouble at all. She was wearing loose fitting white capri pants with a blue babydoll tee and some white strappy things on her feet that showed off a set of cute little toes.
She was watching him examine her and began to feel a little self-conscious “So...” she drawled “you ready?”
“Yeah” he said clearing his throat. He reached for her hand and when flesh met flesh he felt an electrical shock that sizzled all the way down to his toes. He immediately snatched his hand back and stared at her in amazement. He had never before felt that jolt of electricity run through his body at nothing more than a simple touch from a woman. He had a feeling that he was in serious trouble with this one.
She looked at him quizzical “Something wrong?”
“No” he said trying to regain his composure “let’s get going.”
They drove in silence. He was lost in thought. Too busy over analyzing the sparks he had gotten from just the touch of her hand. He pulled up in front of the Majestic on Woodworth Avenue and parked the car. He got out and came around to open the door for her.
“Ummmm Marshall” she said with nervous tension tinging her voice “I was thinking maybe we could go some place a bit more simple.”
“Yeah?” he questioned “like where?”
“Oh I don’t know?” she said smiling “some place casual.”
“I could always take you back to McDonald’s” he said laughing.
She punched him playfully in the arm grinning from ear to ear “How about Taco Bell?” she asked.
“Really?” he questioned her suspiciously trying not to get his hopes up.
“Sure” she said with a wink “Libby says that’s your favorite.”
He burst out laughing “Well thank God for Libby.”
He walked around, got back in the drivers seat and headed for Taco Bell.
As they were pulling out of the drive thru at Taco Bell Marshall looked over at her “So where should we go to chow down on this fine fare?” he asked.
“I don’t know?” she laughed shrugging her shoulders “I hadn’t thought of that.”
“How about my house?” he asked looking over at her.
“Are you sure?” she muttered shyly.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” he questioned. He was curious to hear her answer.
“Well we just met and all” she said seriously “and I am sure that your privacy is very important to you so.....”
He cut her off “If I didn’t want you coming back to my house” he said gently “then I wouldn’t have asked.”
“Ok” she smiled “but no funny stuff.”
He laughed “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
“Yeah that’s what they all say” she said smiling.
~*~
They pulled up in front of his house and she practically swallowed her tongue. “Good God it’s magnificent” she said turning toward him.
“Thanks” he said smiling. He was proud of what he had accomplished. He had certainly paid the price for his fame but none the less he was still proud.
He came out of nowhere opening her door and she jumped “Shit” she muttered “I didn’t even hear you get out of the car.”
He laughed “Come on” he said grabbing her hand. Feeling that shock course through him again but this time he didn’t let go.
She was trailing behind him trying to take in her surroundings “Where’s your daughter?” she asked.
“Oh she’s with Kim” he said looking back at her “it’s just us.”
“Are you sure you didn’t have this planned Mr. Mather’s” she tsk tsk’ed.
“You never know” he replied giving her a mischievous grin.
She laughed at him as he let them in the house. He flipped on the light in the foyer and led them to the family room “We can eat in here” he said.
“K” she said not even glancing his way. She was too busy ogling the state of the art entertainment center to pay him any mind. “Libby would be in heaven” she whispered.
“You should bring her over sometime” he said as flipped on the rather large plasma screen TV “she can play with Hai.”
“Oh I don’t think you wanna do that” Brianna laughed as she sat down on the leather sofa. It was so soft it felt like churned butter. Smooth and creamy against her legs. She sighed at the sensation as she muttered “I have a hard enough time keeping her off of you as it is.”
He quietly laughed at her and walked over to plop down next to her on the couch. He handed her the tacos they’d ordered. She unwrapped hers and greedily bit into one. The crunchy shell loudly breaking letting crumbs fall unnoticed onto her lap. Marshall was entranced. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her as her soft luscious lips bit into the hard crunchy shell of her taco again. He moaned amazed at himself that this woman could make something as silly as eating a taco look so damn inviting. She glanced up at the sound of his moan and her eyes widened at the unadulterated lust she saw swimming in the baby blue depths of his captivating eyes. She swallowed the remains of her taco quickly and without thinking of the consequences slowly ran her tongue across her full lips to get rid of any lingering crumbs. Marshall couldn’t stop himself he bent forward and flicked his tongue out to caress hers. She was the one who moaned this time and her taco fell from her limp fingers to lay forgotten in her lap as she grabbed his head and forced her tongue in his mouth. He groaned and the sound sent shivers up her spine. Their tongues fought with eachother in some kind of primitive mating ritual and he pressed her into the back of the couch putting his weight on her crushing the forgotten taco between them. She reveled in the feel of his hard masculine body pressing into hers. He was hard as a rock and ready to burst and she could feel the evidence of that pushing insistently against her pelvic bone. His hand snaked up under her tee and gently squeezed her already hardened nipples. She began to run her hands up under the back of his shirt as he moved lower. When he got to her inner thigh and was about to touch her in a place that only *one* other man had ever touched her she came out of her fog and her hand shot out to stop him.
“I can’t” she whispered trying to regain control and catch her breath. “I’m sorry” she muttered grabbing his face and forcing him to meet her eyes. She was desperately afraid of what she’d see in them but all she saw was raw passion. “It’s not you” she whispered “I want you, you have no idea how much but I can’t. It’s too soon.”
He smiled down at her and gently captured her lips “You have no idea how much I respect you for that” he whispered.
She breathed a sigh of relief. She was half expecting to be tossed out on her ass for being such a cock *tease*. “I’m sorry” she said again.
“Don’t be” he whispered his voice so gentle it caused a trail of goose bumps to dance wildly across her skin. “I understand. How about we watch a movie instead?”
“Ok” she smiled at him. He was being so kind to her.
They got the movie set up, popped some popcorn, grabbed a couple cans of soda and sat down to watch *The Matrix* which he explained was one of his all time favorites. Halfway through the movie he felt her head rest lightly on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her delicate waist and pulled her closer. When he looked down to see those beautiful blue eyes all he saw was her closed lids. He smiled to himself as he trailed a finger across her lips. This one was *special* he could feel it in his heart. She must be one of the good ones that Dre had told him actually exist. He would have to tread carefully here. It was foolish to dive in head first but he knew if he kept spending time with her that she would own his heart sooner or later.
He lightly nudged her and her enchanting eyes slowly fluttered open “Let’s get you home sweetheart” he said softly kissing her forehead.
“K” she whispered smiling up at him. She felt her heart fluttering wildly and that dull ache that had made it’s home in the pit of her stomach ever since Libby’s father had passed began to dissipate just a bit........Chapter 3
Author's Note: Big thanks to Alexia for the very sweet review that you left in the feedback section! You have no idea how much it meant to me! Also thanks to Jenn, Shorty, Taz and Christie for the feedback on Chapter 1.
They stood at her front door mere inches from one another. The heat radiating from their bodies was near an unbearable level as he leaned into her and claimed her lips in a hungry kiss. The kiss suddenly became primal and left her feeling a bit light headed from the onslaught of sensations coursing through her body. He broke the kiss and backed away from her leaving her breathless and struggling for composure.
“Night beautiful” he whispered leaning into her again his warm breath tickling her ear, sending chills running down her neck and leaving a barely familiar tingling between her thighs.
“Night” she whispered dreamily smiling up at him. He smiled down at her one last time before disappearing into the darkness of the night.
She sighed as she caught the last glimpses of his shadow disappear down the driveway. He had made her feel things that she never wanted to feel again. She turned and quietly inserted her key in the lock. Silently creeping in like some randy teenager coming home late after a wild night out with the boys. She tippy toed through the living room ever mindful of her sleeping daughter.
“SO....” Libby called out from somewhere in the pitch black room causing Brianna to jump back in fear “did you sleep with him mom?”
“Libby?” Brianna questioned reaching for the lamp and clicking it on. The room illuminated with light as Brianna caught sight of her daughter sitting in the chair nearest the front window “what are you doing up and where is Brooke?”
An unladylike snort escaped from Libby as she narrowed her eyes at her mother “You didn’t answer my question” she demanded.
“And you didn’t answer mine.” Brianna retorted.
Libby smiled “Brooke the fabulous” she said her voice dripping with sarcasm “went nighty night HOURS ago. Now answer me, did you sleep with him?”
“Libby” Brianna scolded.
“You didn’t, did you?” Libby interrupted “why, mom?”
“Libby, this isn’t something we should be discussing” Brianna exclaimed “you’re only 13 years old.”
“Yeah mom I am 13” she said seriously “but I’m not stupid, I know what sex is.”
Brianna turned a bit pale at that last statement. Her baby knew about sex? How? “You may very well know what sex is young lady but...”
“He’s gone Ma” Libby said effectively cutting her off. Her voice was coated with sympathy “and he’s not coming back. Don’t you think it’s time you moved on?”
“Libby” Brianna said more softly. That sad far away look creeping into her eyes again.
“STOP” Libby demanded “don’t do that!! Don’t close yourself off again. You felt something for him. I can see it.”
“Maybe I did” Brianna said sadly “but I don’t think I can be what he needs.”
“You can” Libby said rushing over to hug her mother “you just have to let go of Dad first.”
They stood embracing in the middle of the living room illuminated by nothing more than the lamp light as memories of the *only* man she had ever given herself too..mind, body and soul....assaulted Brianna. Tears began to fall. Tears of regret. Tears of longing. Brianna began to sob at the unfair turn their lives had taken as she clutched Libby tighter. She was afraid down to the bone that if she let Marshall in she would forget and she had vowed to *never* forget the the *only* man who had claimed her heart and her body. She stood back and looked at her daughter, Libby, the only real life line she had left between herself and the man who had stolen her heart.
~*~
Marshall was puttering around the house desperately trying to distract himself from the woman who staked her claim to his thoughts. He couldn’t get the vision of her rosy lips and flushed cheeks to leave his battered mind no matter how hard he tried.
“Dad” Hailie said gliding into his room “Mom will be here in a few to pick me up. You aight?”
“Yeah” he said smiling at his angel. They had gotten so close these last couple of months and it killed him that their time for just the two of them was soon coming to an end. At the end of the month it would be back to work for him and he would miss just being with her more than he knew how to express.
“Why don’t you call her?” Hailie asked her Dad.
“Huh?” Marshall questioned. How had she caught on? Was he really acting that forlorn?
“Dad” Hailie scolded “I can see the way you’ve been moping ever since your date with her. If you want to see her again then you have to call her.”
“I know Hai” Marshall said grabbing his girl in a fierce hug “I guess I was just hoping that she would call me, ya know?”
“I know” Hailie said smiling “but sometimes you gotta make the move” she winked at him and backed out of her fathers strong arms “aight I’m outta here. I’ll be back sometime tomorrow”
“Ok Hai” he smiled missing her already “I’ma miss you Hai Hai”
“Ditto Daddy” she said and blew him a kiss before disappearing from his view. He heard Kim a few minutes later and then the house was silent.
He made his way down stairs and wandered aimlessly through the living room. Should he call her? The questioned nagged at his mind relentlessly. He threw it around in his head for a few minutes before deciding to throw all caution to the wind (again) as he reached for the phone. He hadn’t gotten past dialing the first two digits when the doorbell rang. Marshall frowned at the intrusion and stopmed over to the door flinging it open to find one of the security guards that watched over his property standing there looking slightly flustered.
“Yes” Marshall asked expectantly.
“Sorry Sir” the young wet behind the ears security guard stated looking completely intimidated “I didn’t mean to interrupt you sir but we have a young lady at the front gate who is quite insistent on seeing you.”
“Well tell her I don’t appreciate fans coming to my home” he said simply “I value my privacy and I don’t like the intrusion into my personal life.” he began to close the door.
“Yes Sir” the guard said and shot out his hand to stop Marshall from closing the door “but you don’t understand Sir” he said again and Marshall frowned the whole *Sir* thing was getting on his nerves.
“What is it that I don’t understand?” Marshall asked in a cool tone “and don’t call me Sir again, I’m not that fucking old” he bit out.
“Sorry Si....” The guard trailed off looking down at his feet “The girl at the front gate said that if you don’t come down and see her or allow her up to see you that she will cause such a ruckus your neighbors will be talking for years.”
“Really?” Marshall laughed “and did this overenthusiastic young lady say exactly what she needs to see me for?”
“Something about her mother Mr. Mather’s” The guard looked up at him hoping he didn’t offend again.
“It's Marshall” he stated “she said it's about her mother?” he asked confused.
“Yes Marshall” the guard said with more confidence “she said she needs to speak with you regarding her mother.”
“Well I must admit that I am intrigued” Marshall said looking at the guard “tell her I’ll be right down and that this better be good because I really don’t like *anyone* invading my private life.”
The guard nodded his head vigorously and turned to as he was bid. Marshall made his way to the kitchen and grabbed his keys off the hook. He had to admit that he was pretty intrigued by this ballsy kid at the front gate. He exited out the side door, hopped in his SUV and headed for the front gate. As he got closer he could barely make out the young girl being held back by a couple of security guards but there was something vaguely familiar about her. She turned toward him and his heart skipped a few beats. Libby. He was instantly frightened. She had told the guards that she was here about her mother....had something happened to Brianna? He slammed the SUV into park and was out wũthin seconds. He took off at a run and was out of breath by the time he reached her.
He grabbed her by the shoulders and forced her to meet his eyes “Libby” he said fear tinging his voice making it sound strange to his own ears “where’s Brianna? Has something happened to Brianna?”
“You care about her” Libby said a slow smile crossing her innocent face “you really care about her.”
“Of course I do” Marshall stated confused. What the hell was going on here? “Has something happened to her Libby? Is Brianna ok?”
“Yeah” Libby said with that shit eating grin plastered all over her face and Marshall’s heart rate began to return to normal.
“Then I’m confused” he said studying her.
“I just had to make sure that she wasn’t just another fling for you” Libby said sincerely “that you cared.”
“Ok” he said studying her more intensely. There was something on her mind. “Is that all?”
“No” she said letting out the breath she’d been holding.
“Well” he urged.
“Can we go somewhere private” she asked pleadingly.
“As long as you promise not to attack” he said smiling.
“Well.....” she smiled “we’ll have to see about that.”
He laughed “You’re a cool kid Libby” he said motioning her toward his SUV “let’s go on up to the house and you can tell me what’s on your mind.”
“Thank you” she said facing him with a look that tugged at his heart.
“Anytime” he said as they got in the SUV and headed toward his house.
He led her to the family room and she sat down on the same couch that Brianna had laid across not more than a week ago. She looked around nervously “Soooo....” she trailed off wondering if this had been a bad idea. He mother would kill her if she knew that she was here.
“What’s on your mind Libby?” Marshall asked sitting across from her.
“Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea” Libby voiced her thoughts and looked over at Marshall to gauge his reaction.
“Spill it” he said looking at her.
“Ok” she said taking a deep breath and blurting out “Shelikesyoubutshesscared”
“Scared?” he asked arching an eyebrow “of me?”
“No, not of you really” she said “just of what you make her feel.”
“You’re losing me” Marshall said trying to comprehend exactly what she was trying to tell him.
“Look my dad died” she said bluntly “and my mom hasn’t been the same since and you are making her feel things but I can see her backing off and I don’t want her to do that” she said honestly “I want her to be happy and I think that you could make her happy.”
He was busy trying to digest this information so he didn’t see the look of desperation on Libby’s face. When he glanced up at her it tore his heart out.
“You’re here in my home pouring out your heart for your mom” he said going over to kneel in front of her “but what about you Libby?” he asked enfolding her in his arms “what about you?”
“I’m fine” she said softly as an unnoticed tear slid down her innocent face and landed on his shirt. He could feel the pain pouring out of her child’s heart and he wished to God that he could do something to ease it but there was nothing that he could say to take away a pain that ran this deep so instead he held her and let her ride it out.......Chapter 4
Author's Note: I dedicate this chapter to Jenn for her *brilliant* advice, her total and selfless help and her unfaltering support. You are an exceptional lady Jenn and I feel blessed to know you. Also thanks to Taz (you are a sweetie), amy, Sky_Jay, Tine, Shorty, Dani and Carmen!!
Brianna bolted upright in bed sweat beading all over her pale body causing her to shiver. She was fighting to get her breathing under control and regain some sense of herself but the dream had affected her more than she was willing to admit. She felt ashamed. How could she have disrespected Devin's memory like that. The dream came floating back into her mind like some taunting presence set out to make her pay for these disturbing thoughts. She tensed and squeezed the sheets so hard that her knuckles began to ache from the death grip she had. She could see it all so clear again. She let out a strangled sob, closed her eyes tight and silent tears slid through her closed lids as her mind forced her to relive it....
*The sunshine warmed Brianna's face and the wind danced over her exposed flesh as Devin laid her back against the soft blanket covering the dew kissed grass. He trailed hot kisses over her neck and collarbone and she moaned at the intense pleasure it shot through her innocent body. She was a *virgin* and this would be her first time. She was giddy with anticipation and scared down to her toes of the unknown territory that she was about to enter. She felt his strong hands skim her inner thigh and she giggled. The giggling slowly died as his had covered her fully and began to massage her sex. She arched her back as waves of pleasure she didn't know she could feel crested through her body. He was trying to be gentle but her responsiveness was driving him out of his mind. He claimed her lips as he inserted one finger into her tightness trying to prepare her for what was to come. She moaned into his mouth as a confusing wash of pleasure and pain assaulted her. He removed his finger and gently spread her thighs as he settled himself above her hovering on the brink of heaven. He looked into her eyes for assurance and his heart soared at the love he saw trapped in her intense stare. He surged forward and entered her untouched womanhood as slowly as he could and she tensed in pain but begged him to go on. She wanted to be one with him more than she wanted to breathe. He continued to thrust into her as she looked into his captivating eyes but something suddenly changed...the eyes weren't right....her body tensed and she squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head to clear her vision but when she opened them Devin was gone and Marshall hovered over her thrusting into her body......*
Her lids slowly opened and she stared at the ceiling in shame. She gently laid back against the pillow and closed her eyes again trying to sleep but she knew that sleep would be futile.....
~*~
Marshall gently knocked on Brianna's door and stood waiting for her to answer while his stomach churned with nerves. He wasn't sure if he should be here. He wasn't sure what he should say. He wasn't sure of anything. She opened the door and that bright smile she always wore became tense as she saw him standing there.
"Marshall" she said in a completely impersonal tone that confused him.
"Brianna" he said trying to sound light when he felt anything but at the moment "may I come in?"
She stepped back without speaking and opened the door wider for him to enter. She was careful not to touch him as she closed the door and moved across the room before turning to face him.
"Is there something you needed?" she said in that disconnected tone again.
He didn't know what possessed him to dive right in but he did "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked trying to meet her eyes but she refused to look at him.
"Tell you what?" she asked confused finally lifting her head to meet his eyes.
"About your husband" he practically whispered.
Her whole body tensed "What was I supposed to tell you about him?" She asked defensively.
"That he died" Marshall said staring into her eyes.
A million emotions crossed her face never fully landing on one particular emotion and it ate at him. He reached out for her but she jerked back like he had stung her "Don't touch me" she said her voice dripping with venom.
"Brianna..." he trailed off looking at her with the sadness he felt for her and Libby shining brightly in his eyes.
"I don't want your fucking pity" she bit out trying to move past him "I don't want anything from you."
He grabbed her arm and she froze for a fraction of a second before pulling her arm free of his grasp and yelling "I don't know who told you about this but I want you out!"
"Brianna" he pleaded
She cut him off "OUT" she yelled at the top of her lungs "get the FUCK out of my house" she practically spat at him as she moved past him and moments later he heard her door slam.
He stood there for a minute berating himself for coming at her like that. He shook it off and headed for the door. He wasn't halfway down the driveway when he heard the sobs coming from somewhere off to his left. He couldn't see anything so he made his way over to the side of the house and that's when he spotted her and the sight shattered his heart.
Libby laid curled up in the fetal position sobbing. "Please don't leave" she cried out "you can't leave."
He dropped to his knees and gathered her in his arms "Oh God baby" he whispered while he pathetically attempted to comfort her.
He sat rocking her as she mumbled things to him that just about broke him. He was catapaulted back into his fucked up childhood and he winced as the wounds he had fought years to heal slowly began to reopen as he held this weeping, completely lost little girl. Even though the circumstances were different his heart ached for her because he new what it was like to loose the *love* of a *father*.
"Libby I'm here" he whispered "I'm not going anywhere."
He felt het body tremble as she spoke "You will" she said her voice sounding strangled with tears "she's already pushed you away."
"Doesn't matter" he said running his hands over her baby soft hair "no matter what happens between me and your mother, I won't leave you."
She pulled back to look at him with a look of pure adoration and he reached out to brush away her fallen tears. She rested her cheek in his palm "I miss him" she whispered brokenly.
"I know" he said rubbing his thumb over her soft cheek "God baby I know."
"She doesn't understand" Libby said. Her voice thick with emotion "she loves me but she thinks she is the only one who hurts."
Libby suddenly tensed in his arms as she heard her mother's voice calling for her. She frantically swiped her hands over her eyes and her tear stained cheeks. "I can't let her see me like this" she said pleadingly "it would hurt her."
"Maybe that's what she needs" he said grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to look at him "she needs to know that you are hurting too"
Brianna turned the corner and froze as she saw Marshall comforting her daughter. She rushed forward and she felt Libby tense as she put a hand on her daughters shoulder.
"Libby" she uttered her voice strained with concern. Libby turned her tear ravaged face toward her mother and Brianna gasped. "what happened" she asked turning an accusatory glance at Marshall.
Libby started to speak but Marshall cut her off "Libby please go inside" he said gently "I need to talk to your mother."
Libby's bottom lip trembled as she looked at him but she did as he asked.
Once they were alone Brianna turned her gaze toward him and opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off before the words could leave her mouth.
"Do you realize what you are doing to her?" he asked searching her face.
She reeled back in shock and grabbed her face as if he'd just slapped her "Me?" she questioned.
"Yes, you dammit" he said his temper breaking through "are you too stubborn to see that she is hurting?" he asked "or maybe you're just too selfish to share his memory with her and want to keep *him* all to yourself" he spat out and she flinched at his harsh words "I don't know but whatever it is, I won't let you do it" he was yelling now as his temper flared fully and began to work it's way completely over the edge "do you hear me Brianna? I won't let you break that girl anymore than you already have. The really sad thing is that you are too fucking blind to notice that she is killing herself trying to be strong, for you!" he laughed bitterly.
"I-I.." she stuttered.
"I don't want to hear any of your paltry excuses" he bit out sufficiently cutting her off "I like you" he said a bit more gently and with pure honesty "and I want to be with you more than you realize but" he stated with force demanding her attention "from here on out no matter what does or doesn't happen between us I will NOT abandon your daughter. She needs someone and apparently you are too trapped in your own grief to care about hers." his heart ached for the brutal words he had said to her but he knew that they needed to be said. He looked at her one last time and reached out to caress her beautiful face before turning and disappearing out of sight.
Brianna stood there and watched him vanish from view. He was an amazing man she smiled bitterly and she knew down to her core that she had just fucked up what could have been something really special but the memory of her husband just wouldn't allow her to open her heart to him. She sighed and tears fell for what seemed like the thousandth time since she met him as she turned and started toward the house. Toward Libby.....Chapter 5
Author's Note: I dedicate this chapter to Alexia because I wrote this Chapter just for her as kinda like a *Christmas Gift*...Thank you for all your sweet words Alexia!! Also BIG props to all my girls....Jenn, Christie, Tine, Shorty, Taz, American Sweetheart, Sky_Jay and amy!! Your feedback is what keeps me going and always puts a smile on my face!! So THANK YOU!! Enjoy!!
The song that I used in this chapter is *Somewhere I Belong* by Linkin Park!
~*~
There was a tornado of emotions swirling through Brianna’s head causing mass chaous and a raging pain behind the eyes that nearly brought her to her knees. She placed her hands on either side of her head and screamed. She screamed for herself. She screamed for Devin. She screamed for Libby. She screamed for all that she had lost. She screamed for all that she still had to lose. The pain consumed her and she was on the precipice of madness. Why? The memories ran through her mind like flashes of bright light that stung the eyes and numbed the brain. She couldn’t take the pain. She flopped down on her bed and squeezed her eyes tight to force away the images that played games with her mind but she couldn’t escape. She was trapped. Held captive in the past. She couldn’t turn it off so she was forced to ride the roller coaster that raced through her......
(When this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find/
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
But all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
She was viciously thrown back to the *beginning* of the *end* of her life as she’d known it.....thrown back to that moment in time that stood frozen and imprinted in her mind......thrown back to that day five *long* years ago when her heart had been ripped out and torn to shreds.....It had started like any other day before that....she had gotten up and gone about her day as if she didn’t have a care in the world.....but that had all been shattered by one small two syllable word that still made Brianna tremor in fear and rage when she heard it.....*cancer*.....Devin had cancer........
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
A ragged moan escaped her lips as she tried to push past the initial shock that was still so fresh as she was forced to relive that moment......she shook her head but the images were still there like it had been yesterday...... all the pain....... all the suffering....... all the sleepless nights....... she shuttered and a silent tear slipped down her cheek. She had tried to fight her way through the pain but no matter how hard she tried....it lived on....in her mind.....in her heart........The cancer had eaten Devin alive and within a year he was gone and she was left broken and alone......
And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
She had drawn inside of herself after Devin had died and they didn’t know if she was ever going to come back out into reality but she had fought her way through the darkness and back into the light. For Libby. She was the light at the end of the tunnel but Brianna had never really been the same after his death..... Her fairy tale life had taken a tragic turn.......she felt hollowed out..... Completely alone...... she dragged herself through....day after day for Libby’s sake but she heard the whispers behind her back and the looks of pity stamped on the faces of friends and family.....“Poor Girl”.....“She needs to be strong for Libby”.......“It’s time that she moved on”.....but she didn’t want to move on.....she couldn’t forget....she wouldn’t forget.... It had been too much for her too handle so she had taken Libby and ran....
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
She had run as far and as fast as she could.....but now......she opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling as Marshall’s image shimmered brightly.....she felt the pang of guilt course through her body as she thought about him and how good it had felt to have his lips on hers and the feel of his masculine body pressed against her.....she wanted him but......she shuttered as the memories assaulted her.......the image became blurry and another image came into view.......Libby.......her daughters image now hovered next to Marshall’s and her heart ached as she saw the sadness that she had never realized lived behind her daughters soulful eyes........she wanted to stop running.....she needed to stop running.........
I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I'll find myself today
She sat up and the images faded......she *would* stop running.......she needed to be more than some hollowed out person........drifting through life.......afraid to live.......Libby deserved better than that and so did she....
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
Marshall......his image came fluttering back and she smiled......the smile was replaced with a frown when she thought back to the scene outside her house and the harsh words he’d spoken to her.......words that in her heart she knew she had deserved......he’d probably lost any interest that he’d had in her but maybe that was for the best......she had to fix things with Libby before she could even consider letting a man into her heart again......
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong
She stood up and looked around her lonely room.....today she would start over......today she would begin to live again.......today she would find somewhere she belonged.......she walked out of her room intending to leave her past behind her........she headed for Libby’s room a smile on her face.....the first one that hadn’t felt forced in five years........
~*~
Brianna had a death grip on the steering wheel as she pulled up in front of Marshall’s sprawling mansion. She hadn’t seen him since that day in the yard when he’d spoken to her in anger. She put the car in park and sat staring as her nerves began to eat her alive. She sighed and opened the car door...it was now or never and really how bad could it be.....
“Mom” Libby smiled as she flung open the door “Come in, come in”
“Libby” Brianna said hesitantly “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Let’s just go, ok?”
“Nope! Not ok” Libby said frowning at her “Come on mom” she pouted “he’s having a BBQ out by the pool. Can we please just stay for a little while longer.”
*stop running*stop running*stop running*stop running*stop running* she chanted to herself as she looked at the hopeful look in her daughters beautiful eyes “Ok” she relented.
Libby’s bright smile melted Brianna’s heart “Thanks mom” she gushed and rushed forward to embrace Brianna in huge hug.
Brianna’s nerves began to go into overdrive as Libby led her out to the pool area. She spotted Marshall immediately and her heart skipped a beat. She smiled at him and some of the tension eased as she started to walk toward him but the tension she’d been feeling returned in full force when she saw some bouncy brunette run up and plaster herself to Marshall’s body. She was giggling and rubbing against him seductively and it made Brianna’s blood boil. He didn’t seem to mind and that pissed Brianna off even more. She saw red as she fought to maintain control of her rage as Marshall’s *Barbie Doll* continued to rub her store bought body all over him. She turned on her heel and was halfway to the house when she came to an abrupt stop. OH NO she berated herself. She would not tuck her tail between her legs and run again. If Marshall liked to play with *Barbie’s* then fucking let him she though with menace. She turned and spotted a couple of Marshall’s friends lounging by the pool. *Oooohhhh two could play this game* she thought with a mischievous grin. She sauntered over to where Marshall’s friends were chatting and sat down.
“Hey” she said giving them her *best* sexy smile.
They turned to look at her and she winked. “Hey” one of them spoke up turning around to fully face her “come on over and sit your cute ass down” he said returning her wink.
She giggled that extremely annoying girlish giggle that men seemed to go crazy over and sat down “Names Brianna” she said extending her hand “and you are?”
“DeShaun” he said smiling “but most people call me Proof”
“Awww *Proof* of the infamous D12" she said with an arched eyebrow “Libby loves you guys.”
“Well Libby’s a cool chick with great taste” he laughed “so you Libby’s mom?” he asked leaning in closer.
“Yeah” she said in that breathy whisper that she knew drove men wild. She was playing with fire and she was most likely gonna get burned but what the hell she thought. She would not let Marshall know how bad seeing him with his *Plastic Princess* hurt her to the core.
“She’s a great gal” Proof said “Hai Hai absolutely loves her”
“Yeah she is pretty terrific” Brianna smiled at the compliment he had given her daughter.
“So why don’t you get a suit on” he winked “and we’ll take a dip in the pool”
She gave that ridiculous laugh again “Sorry” she said giving him that obnoxious pouty look “didn’t bring one”
“Oh I’m sure Marshall has spares” Proof said
“I’ll just bet he does” she said not catching the strains of venom that were laced through her statement.
Proof laughed and looked at her with a smile “You wouldn’t be using me to bait Marshall, now would you?”
Her head snapped up “Yeah” she whispered with an apologetic look stamped all over her face “sorry. It’s just that I didn’t want him to know that seeing him with *her*” she bit out pointing at Marshall’s newest conquest “bothered me.”
“Don’t apologize” he said laughing “your secrets safe with me.”
“Really?” she said releasing the breath that she’d been holding.
“Yeah” he said “why don’t you have Libby find you a spare suit and we’ll fuck with him a bit.”
“Naughty, Naughty” she muttered laughing as she got up to find Libby and snag that spare suit.
~*~
She stood in front of the mirror in the spare bathroom and winced as she looked at the pathetic excuse for a bathing suit that Libby had given her. It was barely there. A few scraps of material held up by some shit that was thinner than fishing line. She took a last look and headed for the pool. Let the games begin........Author: AIMEENDREW@aol.com
These stories are for entertainment purposes only. They are completely fictitious, and the authors mean no harm to EMINEM, his family, friends, or anyone else that may have been depicted as a 'real life' character. No money was made on the fiction here, either directly or indirectly, i.e. paid advertising. In other words - it's just a bunch of shit we wrote for fun. Please don't take it seriously.